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Beauty & Fitness

We're chicks. Beauty matters.

And.... If we're in the right mood so does fitness. Meh.

Skinny Jeans

10/26/2013

 
Picture
So ladies I bought a pair of skinny jeans today. Yes I did. I've been resisting it for a long time now, hoping it would go away like I hoped cropped pants would. I like my Gap boot legs.

I have given birth to five babies so, I'm just wondering: Are skinny jeans that attractive for me? Extremely wide mommy hips tapering down to tiny ankles. Does the world need to see that, I really don't know. The hip to ankle proportional attractiveness ratio is a little disorienting and possibly not working in my favor.

I had them on earlier and did not even feel like an Earthling. I could not move my knees. I walked around the house like I was attached to a large plank. Not moving my arms for greater effect. I announced in my best raspy old lady voice that I needed an oxygen tank and an IV.   

My 13-year-old daughter said, "Mom, just be yourself. You don't need to wear skinny jeans." That was really sweet. But I say, I am being myself in trying somewhat to keep up with the bizarre styles as they change over the years. I'm trying to power through the fashion trend like a champ.

Does anyone else my age (I'm 42) notice they are looking mighty eighties in these jeans? I mean all I need is a baggy U2 concert t-shirt and some big bangs with hairspray and I'm there. It's fun to go with the fashion flow to an extent. That whole shoulder pad phase back in the day really did need to phase out. So we are relieved sometimes, but other times I get the feeling the fashion world designer people are playing a big joke on us. If we wear the skinny jeans, we have to revamp our whole balance equilibrium scene. The tops have to be flowy and tunic-chic rather than tailored. The shoes can't be clunky clogs but rather whispy little things. You change the jeans, you change your whole equilibrium. And then you buy more stuff. It's a beautiful thing for the fashion industry. Thus my stubborn resistance until now.

My extremely cute neighbor told me I can pull it off and to try them out under tall brown boots or wear them with ballet flats. All right, I'll give it a whirl but if people think I have gone '80s for Halloween I will not be surprised.



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    Author

    Jennifer Houlihan lives triumphantly in Georgia
    with her husband and their five children.

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Photos used under Creative Commons from Sunset Sailor, Andrew Kalat, Broo_am (Andy B), Protonotarios, vitamindave, davidheavy2001, RLHyde, Emilio_13, Robynlou8