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Marriage

We as wives have been given great power, to bless and be supportive of our man. Why else would that mischievous snake have gone to Eve in the Garden of Eden, unless he knew this to be true? We can do a better job than Eve, ladies.

Jennifer's hero and husband, in front of a C-130

A Little Brighter

1/6/2014

 
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A motorcycle crash nearly killed Rose's husband. Brad was coming home from work one night on his motorcycle, like he always did. A car didn't see him in time. The doctors thought he might not make it. They told the family to say their good-byes at one point. His pelvis was broken in two. He was bleeding internally. He was unable to move in the hospital for weeks. He was in tremendous pain. He endured many procedures. He is in rehabilitation therapy now.

Brad and Rose go to my family's church. 
Rose has lived up to her name, blooming sweetly and caring for Brad, staying by his side, staying strong for the family. Some days you know she must have been feeling fragile, like a wilted flower, as we all would in her devastating situation.

What would it be like, to stand by helplessly as her husband was broken in two and not knowing if or when he would be back to normal? Not having him to talk to. Being without him. Seeing him in all that pain. Just like that, Rose's life changed. 

Rose is a strong lady. This is what the Bible (taken from Proverbs 31) says about wives like Rose. "Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. She riseth while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. Strength and honor are her clothing, and she shall rejoice in time to come. She openeth her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness. She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. Her children arise up, and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praiseth her."

That really does describe Rose. She's not one of these fussy high maintenance girls. She dresses so pretty and always looks nice and yet she's the kind of wife who kills snakes, stands up to foxes, and runs coyotes off their property. I am pretty sure I remember hearing her say something about a time she was driving a bush hog. And she's been through some stuff. She already lost a husband to leukemia and after he died, she still took care of his elderly mama. (I told you she was sweet.) Her granddaughter miraculously survived after being born so prematurely she barely weighed anything.

Rose and Brad are sparkles of light at our church, always smiling, always encouraging, always glorifying God. Every church has folks like that I would guess. They're the sparkly ones at our church. Makes you wonder why the Lord lets things like this happen. I know we're not supposed to question, but I wonder why maybe He didn't let a grumpy guy get hit on his motorcycle instead. Let a mean husband have his life shattered. Why Rose's husband? It's hard to accept.

When my friend Kim's family went to visit Brad, they hoped to cheer him up and strengthen his faith. Kim said they were the ones strengthened. He was the one witnessing to them. His own mother said she thought her faith was strong until she saw Brad's. All of us have been amazed by his faith, and Rose's.

When I asked Rose if I could tell you about the motorcycle crash, this is what she said. It is one of the most beautiful things I have ever heard anyone say. And she said it while she had the flu.

"God's grace is so real in our lives. We could not have done this without our Lord holding us.
Brad is taking steps now. We praise God for that.
We are so very thankful for our church family. We love our church as a whole family so much. And we're waiting to get things back to normal again.
We don't understand the trials that God puts us through. But only: He has his reasons.
And He just knocks off the dust, so His light can shine through better, that's all."



If You Think You Want Out

11/23/2013

 
Scriptures on divorce
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I want to offer hope in the midst of a storm.

In trying to help two couples considering divorce, I went through my entire Bible, every page, and wrote down the scriptures that I thought would address pain and heartache in the context of marriage in the face of divorce.

Please read those by clicking on the button above. Please read them, before you make any decisions. Please read them, and decide to fight for your marriage with God as your strong Father. Nothing is too hard for Him.



What if he isn't perfect?

11/1/2013

 
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Marriage is easy for you, Jennifer, you might be thinking. You have this perfect husband, this stud pilot guy who treats you right. You gush about him constantly and y'all are so in love. Everything is so perfect and easy for you. 

And I would respond: "Is that so?"

I never want to dishonor my husband, and I don't want you to dishonor yours, so I would like us to all talk in generalities about our men. No man but Jesus Christ has ever been perfect and so our husbands cannot be perfect. That means, surprise, mine isn't perfect.

I really do not want to drag each other through the details of that because the Bible says to "pour your heart out before the Lord." I've decided that if I changed the prepositional object in that sentence to anyone but the Lord, i.e., my chick friends such as you, I would be changing and therefore defying God's word. It has really grieved me to hear the way women casually criticize their husbands in public: perfect strangers standing in line at the post office, gab to anyone who will listen about their husband's mistakes, exposing their husband's weaknesses and failures.

I know there can be a great deal of pain in marriage. Different ladies have varying degrees of pain and heartache to endure in their marriages, at different times. I don't have all the answers of course, but I can tell you one thing I have learned, and that is this. We can decide to be committed to a loving marriage, no matter what a husband does or says. We don't get to wait until he's perfect before we will bestow all the things a loving wife would bestow. We will be waiting, frosty and bitter, the rest of our lives. Don't hold back, just love on him right now. Don't waste another moment of another day.     



    Author

    Jennifer Houlihan lives triumphantly in Georgia
    (USA) with her husband and their five children.


    Testimony

    Click to read Jennifer's
    Christian testimony.


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